What a difference a day makes. A day, some IV drugs, and some sleep. Easter Sunday was wonderful.
Saturday’s hospital adventure saw Mom back home around dinner time.
Originally, Saturday was planned to be a special night; my daughter Mia had completed her RCIA program and was to be Baptized, Confirmed, and receive her First Holy Communion at Saturday’s Easter Vigil Mass at St. John the Baptist Church, and Mom was to be her Sponsor / Godmother. As Mom was leaving the hospital, she was checking her watch to see if she could still make it, but we had already moved on to Plan B; Mia’s instructor stood in as Mom’s proxy sponsor, and Mom settled in at home and watched the live-stream of the service with Angella and Alia.
Just before Mass ended, Monsignor Lawrence took a few moments to recognize the new members of the church, and to thank their instructors and sponsors, and then gave a shout out to Mom specifically, stating that he knew she wanted to be there, and then she was sick and asked the church to continue to pray for her.
It was a really nice moment.
Monsignor also mentioned me, that he knew I also wanted to be there, but surely I was at my mom’s bedside. I was — in spirit! In actuality, I was back at my home, with my other kids, watching the live-stream on my iPad, recovering from the previous 24 hours of being at Mom’s bedside. I spent the 2.5 hours during the Mass cleaning up the house and getting ready for the Easter Bunny to come, as all of that still needed to happen of course. Our youngest very much expected the full Easter show, and while we had planned for all of us to go to Easter Vigil, he has become unsettled this past week with all of the changes and the chaos. We knew there was no way he could handle a long Mass at night, so we split up, and my wife Angie Rae took Mia for her big night.
Both of my amazing sisters messaged me separately to let me know that Mom got to watch the whole thing, and that Alia and Mom held hands during Mia’s Baptism.
On Easter Sunday, after baskets and our annual “egg hunt in the house” and pancakes with my whole fam, I went to Mass by myself. Mom is my usual partner in church during the early Mass on Sundays; this time I went to the later service (11am) alone. It was an amazing service, as Monsignor arranged to have some trumpet (!) players accompany the organ, and it was spectacular. Breathtaking. (If you are Catholic, and you know how we don’t sing the “Gloria” during Lent, but start it again on Easter; well, with the trumpets, it was just awesome).
Mom would have loved it.
By early afternoon all the families were gathering at Mom’s, and even if some of the grand kids had other commitments during the day, they all stopped in for at least part of the day. One of Mom’s sisters was there with her husband when I arrived, and one of Mom’s good friends and her husband stopped in after dinner.
We had 25 people in and out all day, with most staying for most of dinner, which was fantastic. Both of my sisters had set the table the night before and had most of the food (ham, some bakes, etc) prepped and my wife made up a wonderful salad and grilled some vegetables. Aunt Janine brought some food, and we had acquired some babka and Easter bread and kielbasa from T&F the day before. That plus some kielbasa from Port Richmond and some pound cakes from Stocks that some close friends dropped off on Saturday morning led to an incredible feast.
I reheated some breads from Marchiano’s for appetizers and quickly got in the way and was making a mess trying to slice them up so I got out of the way. I was still feeling a little out of sorts from the day before, I guess, or just tired and lazy maybe. Anyway, Angella made the mashed potatoes that I had volunteered to make and, well, it all worked out. It takes a village and all of that.
Mom was so pleased with the big, full table, and with all of the people, and her spirits were high. She was able to eat some — especially the mashed potatoes — and seemed to really enjoy the day.
As we were finishing cleaning up, she was buzzing about, wiping things down, directing where things should go, re-making the table for regular use. It seemed like normal Mom after a normal Sunday dinner.
We all went home and Mom and Dad took charge to manage Mom’s care through the night. This is the off-week between chemo sessions, and we have hope for some easier nights and some more “normal” days this week. Angella had slept over Saturday night after the hospital and we came up with a new plan for Mom’s meds that should be easier to manage — at least on these off-weeks.
Angella, Alia, and Angie Rae have done so much to cover all of the bases and keep all of this complicated stuff so well organized… but we could all also use a break. This was a tough first week, but we also know this is only the beginning, and we need to pace ourselves. Mom’s care is a marathon, not a sprint, and all of those sort of cliches.
Either way, we all felt like it would be good for Mom and Dad to have some space and some autonomy and manage some of this on their own. And since I am working from one of the empty bedrooms in the house, I would be over early to get the day going.
I went to 7am Mass this morning by myself, and Monsignor reminded us that the Church gives us an Easter Octave, or 8 days of Easter, where each day we are to celebrate as if it was Easter, so daily Mass is in the big church, and all of the decorations and flowers are still in place. I am hoping Mom is up to joining me later in the week for one of these services; they are short, but I think it will be nice to participate in Easter, even if it is only one of the “extra” Easters.
I got to Mom’s house around 7:30; she said she had a good night and got a good bit of sleep, and just had some mild symptoms this morning.
When I walked in, I heard Monsignor Lawrence’s voice echoing through the house; Mom was sitting up in the living room watching the recorded stream from Sunday’s 11am Mass.
“I wanted to hear those trumpets,” she said.
Amen!
Thank you.